Space Money Octagon Presents
The Filmography Disquisition Series
Kristen Stewart: An Exhaustive Examination
Episode 8: The Messengers (2007)
Jess is the troubled and moody eldest daughter of the Solomon family, who has relocated to the country from the big windy city. As they settle into their new home – a totally not haunted house – in farmland, North Dakota, Jess heads onto town to get acquainted with the locals. After chatting up the worst basketball player in the community, Jess returns home and helps her mom move some boxes into the basement. There, she finds an old necklace and a spooky raven, which flies away to join its flock surrounding the house.
One night while babysitting her kid brother, Jess is haunted by visions of the house being destroyed. She’s rescued by a recently hired farm hand, but when she tries to show him what happened, the house is totally normal. As Jess’ haunting continues, her family begins to question her sanity and well being. We soon learn that Jess has a troubled past that includes a drunk driving accident that injured her brother, leading her parents to no longer trust her. This mistrust toward Jess ends in near disaster, as her warnings go unheeded until her parents are also haunted and nearly killed by the farm hand who is actually a dude who killed his family in the very same house five years prior! He had amnesia or something, but getting almost murdered by ravens triggered him. Jess and family fight him off – with a little help from his ghost family – and the murder man farm hand is sucked into the cellar floor. Jess and her family – now free of the spirits – happily harvest their crop of sunflowers in peace.
Join co-hosts Vanessa and Toben on a quest that began (in Volume 1) with one of the most pressing cinematic questions of our time: what’s the best movie Blake Lively’s ever been in?
In Volume 2, Vanessa and Toben seek to determine the best Kristen Stewart move of all time.
They will watch – in chronological order – every major motion picture featuring the actress Kristen Stewart. At the end of each episode, an updated ranking of Kristen Stewart movies will be determined using a refined academic and scientific process.
- Panic Room
- The Safety of Objects
- Fierce People
- Cold Creek Manor
- Catch That Kid
Contact: email@example.com (emails may be read on the show)
Hosts: Vanessa (http://twitter.com/the_virago) and Toben (http://twitter.com/pursuedbyabeard)
Music: Mozart’s Bassoon Concerto in B Flat Major, K. 191 – I. Allegro
performed by the Skidmore College Orchestra
Record start sound effect: https://www.freesound.org/people/Corsica_S/sounds/174771/
Fireplace sound effect: https://www.freesound.org/people/juskiddink/sounds/215658/
Intro voice: @iamastove
This was actually a terrible idea for a podcast